AUTOBIO 1.0
(Short Version)
This is an integrated personality collective unit that makes different forms of art: music, films, books, performances, visual designs.
There is a witness behind it all who write these words but like the waves are not the ocean, these words are not me.
For many years I went one way then abandoned/sabotaged and went another way.
This drove me insane and my insanity drove me crazy but creative.
In sane. In love. Insanities. Inlovities. Creativities.
More waves. Witnesses. Oceans.
Multiversities. Tripolarities.
Om Na Ma Ha
Shi Va Ya Om
AUTOBIO 2.0
(Longer Version)
Been dabbling in the fine arts of music, words, video, performance, dance, and visuals ever since I can remember. It was a way for me to cope with the world. Sensitive kind. Loved watching movies growing up. Reading comics. Listening to albums of my favorite bands. Reading about them and other famous artists in magazines and books. They were my gods. Also drawing which I was never very good at. Goofing off in front of the mirror. Making funny faces. Played different instruments. Happy childhood.
Started writing songs at 15. Life got hard. Curveballs. Demons. Family curses. Surprises. And like life, great art is always surprising. Art imitated life and life imitated art. Tragedy. Comedy. The great perfection. The neverending quest to… remember. Tried and failed and explored identities like costumes or broken socks with holes. Different haircuts. Punk phase. Techno phase. Metal phase. Pop phase. Shred phase. World music phase. Indie rock phase. Prog rock phase. Blues phase. Outlaw country phase. Atheist phase. Psychedelic phase. And many more. All of them merged eventually. Chasing girls and dreams and dragons. Followed fashions. Rejected things, people, ideologies. Learned philosophies. Dabbled and doubted my way through 20s, 30s. This was a brutal game and I had been thrown into the deep end from birth.
Felt liberated when I read writers like Miller and Bukowski or movies of Bertolucci, Jodorowski and Refn because they expressed how I felt. Got lost in time. Somehow survived to tell tall tales some of which I might have imagined. Still chasing something. Maybe just natural human desire and drive to procreate = Professionally create. Or get enlightened. Reach the top and then come back down to tell y’all. That is what I do now. But need to work on opening heart more. Had breakthrough this past weekend.
So much possibility in one sentence.
Created this vicevoids project in summer 2020 (you can find songs on spotify/youtube). Have had a rollercoaster ride with it so far. Drowned it out and got drowned. Then brought it back up again for air. Rescusitated. Or actually it did that to me. Did other things. In between jobs and long bouts of unemployment to do my thing and not have to work dead end jobs which drive me up the fucking wall. But nothing I did was as good as this can be. So decided to come back to it and go with it. Commit to it. Put everything into it. This is me. The real me. All of it. What I do. This is it. Right here. Right now. You reading this. Me writing it. Nowhere else to be. These are my dreamworlds and all my demons dancing with angels in the aftermaths of afterparties on the walk home when you put on some music and feel happy to be alive but sad that the party is over. Worry not friend, there is always another one just around the corner. Celebration. Ceremony. Want to come here every day and write if I can manage it. Tried before but always went berserk. But that was when I had too many other options.
Now just this. Only this.
AUTOBIO 3.0
(Chronology)
The Past
YEAR 0000 – was born
YEAR 0001 – cant remember
YEAR 0002 – cant remember
YEAR 0003 – cant remember
YEAR 0004 – cant remember
YEAR 0005 – heard Poison by Alice Cooper
YEAR 0006 – moved to canada
YEAR 0007 – heard Hello Goodbye by The Beatles
YEAR 0008 – started playing piano
YEAR 0009 – heard Lost Together by Blue Rodeo
YEAR 0010 – started playing drums
YEAR 0011 – started playing guitar
YEAR 0012 – heard Wonderwall by Oasis
YEAR 0013 – heard Until It Sleeps by Metallica
YEAR 0014 – moved back to Finland
YEAR 0015 – started writing songs
YEAR 0016 – started high school
YEAR 0017 – took guitar lessons
YEAR 0018 – released first album “Something To Listen To” and “What’s On My Mind”
YEAR 0019 – graduated from high school
YEAR 0020 – military service
YEAR 0021 – moved into my own place in Helsinki
YEAR 0022 – worked in record store
YEAR 0023 – moved to England
YEAR 0024 – released album “Lions”
YEAR 0025 – lived in Ireland
YEAR 0026 – demon wrestling
YEAR 0027 – released album “Nobody Land”
YEAR 0028 – released album “Aurinkosydän EP”
YEAR 0029 – went to university in Tallinn, Estonia
YEAR 0030 – musician/poet life in Estonia
YEAR 0031 – musician/poet life in Estonia
YEAR 0032 – released album “Dukkha”
YEAR 0033 – lived as street musician in London + with friends in Amsterdam/Toronto/Cozumel
YEAR 0034 – spent year in Finland, invested in cryptos + healing focal dystonia
YEAR 0035 – travelled Balkans, walked Camino, lived in Germany few months
YEAR 0036 – moved back to home city in Finland
YEAR 0037 – started vicevoids + released Music For Lost Souls volumes 1 & 2
YEAR 0038 – released album “VICEVOIDS”
YEAR 0039 – mostly alone at home exploring, practising, writing, creating, etc
The Present:
YEAR 0040 – quit drinking/drugs/pharma/porn, went vegan, sold cryptos & re-invested in detox protocols + appliances, herbs, camcorder, etc
The Future:
YEAR 0041 – location independence
YEAR 0042 – financial indepedence
YEAR 0043 – one million followers on social media
YEAR 0044 –
YEAR 0045 –
YEAR 0046 –
YEAR 0047 –
YEAR 0048 –
YEAR 0049 –
YEAR 0050 –
AUTOBIO 4.0
(Profile)
Born: 1983
Origin: Finland
Heritage: Finnish/Norwegian
Languages: English, Finnish
Profession: poet, musician, performer, music producer
Instruments: guitar, voice, piano
Personality: INTJ-T
Fitness Goals: 20 perfect pullups, 3km cooper test, ashtanga primary series, cartwheels, full pike + pancake
Dream Life: Travel the world as a millionaire musician + build global community of elite new age warriors/wizards of Light
Favorite musicians: John Maus, Jon Hopkins, Jimi Hendrix, Tchaikovsky, Richard Strauss, The National, Coldplay, Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, The Doors, Aphex Twin, Josh T Pearson, Radiohead, Mew, Stevie Ray Vaughan, Nils Frahm, Tom Waits, Leonard Cohen, Bob Dylan, The Band, John Martyn, Eric Clapton, Sting, The Beatles, Rolling Stones,
Favorite albums: Band of Gypsys, Master of Puppets, Whats The Story, Rush of Blood, We Must Become The Pitiless Censors Of Ourselves, Last of The Country Gentleman, Johnny Cash “American Recordings (vol.1)”, Blood on The Tracks, Dark Side of The Moon
Favorite books: Power of Now, Evolutionary Enlightenment, Post Office, Sell Like Crazy, The Fall: The Insanity of the Ego, Beyond Positive Thinking, Ask The Dust, Essays & Fictions (Brad Phillips),
Favorite writers: Henry Miller, John Fante, Matt Kahn, Napoleon Hill, Charles Bukowski, Sam Pink, Nico Walker, Scott Mclanahan, Dan Fante, Nietszche,
Favorite movies: Heat, Triangle of Sadness, Benji, Betty Blue, No Lovers Left Alive, Another Drink, The Hand of God, The House That Jack Built, I Am Heath Ledger, Buffalo ’66, Down By Law, This Place Rules, The Banshees of Inisherin, Frantic, The Stanford Prison Experiment, The Boy The Mole The Fox and The Horse, Mystery Train, Sex Lies and Video Tape, Lady Chatterley’s Lover, Pusher trilogy, What is a woman (docu), Sanctuary, Fat Sick & Nearly Dead (docu), Ask The Dust, Factotum, The Son, Ariel, Joker, Permanent Vacation, Blue Velvet, Wild At Heart, Ingrid Goes West, The Hangover trilogy, Shame, The Last Waltz, Manhunt: Unabomber, Blade Runner 2049, Elegy, Sicario, Hunt For The Wilderpeople, Killing of A Sacred Deer, Tár, Knight of Cups, Midsommar, To The Wonder,
Favorite directors: Refn, Kubrick, Bertolucci, Lathimos, Lynch, Jarmusch, Kaurismäki, Malick, Trier… more here: https://www.imdb.com/list/ls562117034/
Favorite shows: Succession, Beef, Breaking Bad, Baskets, Surveillance, How to with John Wilson, Maniac, Too Old To Die Young, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Kingdom, The Crown, The Affair, Better Call Saul, Living With Yourself, White Lotus, Big Little Lies, Halt and Catch Fire, House of Cards, Enlightened, Mr. Robot, Ray Donovan, Justified, Sopranos, Six Feet Under, The Eric Andre Sh