Positive thinking is the hardest skill in life
or even good thinking or optimistic thinking.
The problem really is bad thinking which creates all our anxiety and problems. And then our terrible feelings compound because we start feeling bad about feeling bad.
I’ve been attempting to master my emotions and thinking for many years now but the mind is cunning. Just when you think you are making progress, something happens in life that throws you in the deep end.
You flail and panic.
It’s like everything you learned or thought you knew is thrown out the window.
But one thing has changed.
I no longer want to avoid my issues.
I am confronting them dead on. Whatever happens. It is torture. It is painful. But I am looking at my demons and all this fear dead in the eye. Gimme what you got. I am not backing down.
Do you see how there are two selves here at war?
I want to end the war.
Hello anxiety. Come inside. Sit down. Lets talk.
Anxiety goes quiet.
Like light filling a dark room.
What happens to the dark?
Is it still there ?
Think positive.
Think real.
Think optimistic.
Does that mean I am gonna believe in a God or some higher force I have no connection with? No it doesn’t but I want to fully investigate something that works for so many people.
I am open to connecting with something within or without.
Something deeper than some shallow fear thing that only makes me feel worse if I let it take over my life and poison everyone around me.
It’s a dangerous game…
My words and even songs can become toxic if you are not ready or understand how my art is a healing process for me and people who take the whole journey.
If you want some simple songs to comfort you in hard times, maybe my songs will do it but if you get to know me, I am a beast. There is a world of pain behind the beauty.
I need to do this. To get things out of my system. To expose the bad forces and see them for what they are. They are not bad. Just misguided.
Is there evil in this world? I mean true evil?
I don’t know. I really don’t.
What if we are all good and evil?
I know, lots of questions.
I’m just throwing some paint on the wall. Let me know what you think about all this. We are all wise idiots. It’s easy to help others but we so get lost in ourselves… and sometimes in each other.
This is a monologue but it can become a dialogue.
I want to start a new music art project with great people.
Something more than just a band…
I know it’s crazy to talk about healing humanity and earth as if Nature doesn’t know what it’s doing. I know some people who are talking about starting communities.
I support them but I just want to be part of the earth community. The milky way community. Travel the world. Meet great people. Find greatness and beauty in ALL people and places and things.
Give more voice and power to my higher self. But also to heal the broken parts. I cannot do it alone. Lonewolf is romantic but I need people too.
A good balance.
We have three relationships that need to be acknowledged, cherished, and cultivated:
1) with someone else (or community)
2) with our work
3) with ourselves
All three are important.
Neglect one and you won’t evolve. You will keep getting yourself into the same mess.
To get out of a hole, first you gotta stop digging.
Share your thoughts.
We’re all stuck at home anyways, so why not.
#timetoheal
#athometogether
Love,
MN
